Everything in life is easier when people find you a likeable person. Am I right, or am I right? We want to be around people we like. Duh! And you’ll find that, in general, people give favor to those who are likeable.
Here are a few tips to help you be instantly more likeable. Now, that sounds like a pretty big claim, doesn’t it?
“Act now! And you’ll be instantly more likeable!”
But I’m as serious as a scientist on this point because likeability is a skill. And all skills can be improved. That means every single one of us can learn to be a more likable person!
So, let’s break down what you can do to be the kind of person other people want to give opportunities to.
Step 1: Lead with curiosity
The world’s most likeable people are genuinely interested in others. The problem is that most of us, especially when we meet new people, think,
“Oh, gosh, I want them to like me, so I’m going to tell them everything about me and I’m really going to try to impress them.”
So we kind of blabber on and on about ourselves.
Be interested in others. Questions are rarely inappropriate and rarely out of line. Most people really appreciate any type of question about who you are, what you do, what you’re about – any of those things. It doesn’t matter whether you’re in line at the grocery store or you’re sitting down for an interview. People like to talk about themselves. And they like people who seem interested in them.
Step 2: Appear confident
How do you do this? Body language! Make sure your arms are not crossed, you’re actually smiling, nodding, and actively listening when someone else is talking.
Most people are not aware of their facial expressions.
And dude, this is such a pet peeve of mine! I’ve seen this happen where someone’s explaining what they do or talking about a recent experience to a small group and there’s one or two people in that small group who have, what I call, “dead-face.” No eyes, no mouth. Just dead. And, to me, as the speaker, when I look at three people and only one of them is smiling, who do I like?
Step 3: Use people’s names
I’m not referring to someone you’ve just met, although that’s super effective, but, rather, someone you’re just getting to know. There is nothing more sweet than the sound of your own name.
Step 4: Be you
We often assume that people want us to be like them. To dress a certain way, talk a certain way, have certain mannerisms. But you can just tell when someone’s being phony baloney. Just be who you are when you’re hanging with a group of people because I guarantee that’s when you’re most likeable.
For step 5, personal anecdotes (including a recent call I had with an executive who wanted my thoughts on a prospective employee), and bonus tips for each of the steps above (to really ensure you’re practicing them effectively), you MUST LISTEN to Why It’s Important To Be More Likeable on The Chalene Show NOW!