Research shows that the quality of friendships is one of the most important factors in determining our happiness, success and overall mental health. Which is why it is so important to identify toxic friendships and then remove them from your inner circle.
Do your friends lift you higher? Do they make you want to be better? Learn more? Be kinder and do right by others? Do your friends see your potential and encourage you to be your best and help others?
Sometimes friendships take a negative turn and they stop adding value and happiness to our lives. It’s a hard realization. And breaking up with a toxic friend can be painful. But in the end, you’ll feel lighter, more present and not obligated to someone who doesn’t deserve your attention.
This of friendship like a bank account. There are deposits and withdrawals. If there are too many withdrawals then you end up with an empty or “overdrafted” account. This leads to stress, unbalance, and instability.
Friends who suck the life out of us ask us for our advice but never take it. One sided friendships are those with people who expect you to be there even when they are not. Friends that lift can will say, “I’m sorry…I messed up. You were right. I was wrong.” Friends who lift want the best for you at all cost even when their honesty might result in a fight or temporary tension. Friends who lift will not tolerate behavior or thinking that is less than you deserve. Ironically, friends that lift require the least amount of maintenance. They just get you!
Invest in friendships that lift you and spend less time and energy on those that don’t.
And let’s be frank…even the best of friends can argue and disagree, but friends who lift always come from a place of your best interest. Real friends are there for each other and just like a marriage… the tough times make you better! So ditch those toxic friendships and hold dear true friends.
It’s less about breaking up with those that drain and more about consciously decided to spend less energy on them. It’s about spending energy with those people who inspire you to be better!
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